We can't stop intense, tricky situations from happening, but we can change our alertness, awareness, and response.
Here are some steps to become more alert, aware, and able to respond quickly and effectively AND stay in alignment with your heart and mind:
- Become more alert by 'brain training' on a regular basis. This means, get your ass on your meditation cushion. This is how you train your brain to listen to you.
- Learn to be more aware by being a Neutral Observer. This means, shut up, watch, and listen. Take in the information around you instead of reacting to it. You ASSESS quietly before you even think of reacting.
- When you've spent a good bit of time training yourself in alertness and awareness skills, you then will naturally have a much more solid capacity for taking true response-ability - meaning you are responding to challenges from a place of truth, love, and compassion.
As your awareness becomes more efficient (because you've done lots of meditation) and your assessment skills are on point (because you've been practicing being a neutral observer), you will find that you naturally respond in ways that are truly in alignment for you.
It's really all about cultivating those initial brain training and neutral observation skills!
Example: Your new client signs a contract with you, pays you part of the money, spends several hours meeting with you, you spend several hours working on their project... They get slack and don't fulfill their end of the agreement and then they want a refund.
Which of the following is the most conscious way to respond???
- Laugh and tell them to go take a hike.
- Give them all their money back and cry alone in your home office, feeling used and abused.
- Promptly respond and list options for fair compromises, take action on one of them, and then create better boundaries and better wording on your contract to protect yourself in the future. Thank them for the lesson.